I became unemployed two weeks ago. To be honest, my hours at work had been on a downward slide for some time now with the company downsizing. This morning I decided to go to Centrelink and apply for the unemployment benefit.
I woke up feeling flat and a little down this morning, but just decided maaybe I needed more sleep. As I walked into the office, I saw some unemployed folk sitting outside drinking from paper bags and smoking rollies made from old cigarette butts and felt my mood plummet even further.
The staff at Centrelink were extremely helpful and I couldn't fault them for the service they provided.
However, it took all the effort I could muster not to burst into tears as I spoke to them. On leaving the office, I had a 'sunglasses' moment as I tried to hide my emotion....
I realised later my belief system is/was that I need to work for a living, that life is meant to be hard and nothing comes easy, so applying for the dole made me feel like a loser and a failure -not just to myself but to everyone around me. No matter what I did, or how much I distracted myself, I could not get past this feeling of hopelessness.
It wasn't until I was talking to Trish, I realised this belief system had entrenched so far into my psyche I became a victim to it without even trying to, or knowing why.
I have come a long way, I am making huge changes in my life and I have the opportunity to start fresh, to do something new in the direction I am pursuing, all I have to do is acknowledge it.
Sometimes we need to step back and realise that some of the belief systems we 'own' are not ours, that we need to acknowledge them and then let them fly free. How often do we reject or miss an opportunity because we don't feel we deserve it or we believe it's not the way things should be?
Its time for me to evaluate my belief systems and work out which are mine, which ones have been inherited or assimilated over the years and be true to me, not someone else's laws and beliefs. I also urge you to look at your own beliefs and cull out the ones that don't serve you or are your truth.
We are born perfect, we are still perfect, even now... we just need to believe in ourselves and dismiss other people's 'stuff' that has influenced us since birth.
Love and respect for ourselves, baby!