Tuesday, 23 August 2011

Remember no matter how murky life gets, the tide always turns...

Is there anyone else out there who plans to go to the beach to retreat, reconnect, to find solace within the ebb and flow of the waves, only to discover the bluddy tide is out?!
Even if I was so inclined, which I'm not, I couldn't even throw myself off the longest pier because I'd only end up on my arse - which is pretty much the norm for me at the moment! I suppose I could have jumped into the mud and prayed for quicksand....
As I sat there, looking at the landscape, I couldn't help but feeling the mud and rocks symbolised my life right at that moment. Everything felt murky and full of obstacles.. I tossed up whether to go back to the comfort of home where I could hide from the biting cold, or remain seated on a stone cold (ha ha) rock, which was probably giving me 'monkey piles' like my Mum warned me about whenever I sat on cold concrete.....A part of me fely I needed to sit there until I could see past the dark and dismal to the tranquil beauty in the distance.
As I sat there on the pile of rocks lying haphazardly around me, I noticed they were kinda smooth after years of being pummelled by the sea.
If I was to equate that to me, I would say, yes, life has shaped me, taken my rough edges off - not without sacrifice or pain, I'm sure! So, within that context, if I was to consider this pile of different shaped rocks around me, I could think of them as my talents, skills and abilities. There are small ones, strange looking ones, big 'in your face' ones, just like my talents or skills. The fact they are all heaped in a big messy pile is relevant too (and yes, I do realise this is a man-made pile...so is mine - well, woman-made! LOL)
Like the rocks stacked here, I am struggling to work out which dream I should be following, which ones inspire and lift me.
All too often as we accumulate skills and talents, but we don't see them as amazing abilities. We take them for granted, or lack the confidence to feel proud of our achievements. It's only when someone points out how awesome it is that we take a step back and notice how incredible we are.
This happened to me this morning when I spoke to a good friend and set me to thinking about what I want to do in my life. I know I love my writing, I love helping others with psychic readings and healing through Reiki and massage, but is this where my passion is, my fire? I already know the answer, these are my passion, they light the fire in my soul, so why am I doing all the other 'stuff'? Its time to cull the ones that don't serve my purpose or help me to be all that I can be.
Back to my seaside musing...
In front of me the rocks thin out and scatter, reducing in size. To me, these represent the obstacles we encounter on our way to personal greatness. By the way, personal greatness isn't measured by wealth, possessions or a great relationship, unless of course its loving ourselves wholly and unconditionally. It's about being all you are meant to be. These rocks are the big incidents in our life, the ones that create change whether we want it or not.
The small rocks gradually give away to rubble and eventually muddy looking sand. These are the day to day tribulations or 'hiccups', like missing a bus or a green light, spilling sugar as we put it in our coffee mug or running out of our favourite biscuits. Apart from those that disrupt our life and change our day or life irrevocably we barely register the impact they have.
Just past that murky patch, the sand is is gleaming in the sun (I have to use a little imagination here, as the sun is behind a cloud and I can't quite see the colour of the sand from here, but I 'know' it to be true).
The sea laps at the sand invitingly, encouraging me to look past all the boulders, rocks, stones, rubble and dirty sand to begin a journey of discovery, full of light and opportunity, to me, to my ersonal greatness if only I take that first step.
I can't take all these rocks with me, or I'll need scuba gear. However, if I take those ones that matter most to me, the ones that light a fire in my belly. I can probably take some and still keep my head above water. Who knows? Once I have put faith in my rocks, they just might float to the surface or even better yet, they may float higher and carry me to where I truly want to be.
It's all about faith, faith in my choices, my abilities, what and who I love and most importantly faith in me!
Cherie x

PS. In the distance I can see someone sitting at the end of another pier. I wonder if they are seeing the beauty around them, or like me, do they have to 'look past' the rocks to get there?
Life is beautiful if we just take the time to sit still and 'be' to notice

Tuesday, 2 August 2011

Other People's Belief Systems - Why Do We Hold Onto Them?

I became unemployed two weeks ago. To be honest, my hours at work had been on a downward slide for some time now with the company downsizing. This morning I decided to go to Centrelink and apply for the unemployment benefit.
I woke up feeling flat and a little down this morning, but just decided maaybe I needed more sleep. As I walked into the office, I saw some unemployed folk sitting outside drinking from paper bags and smoking rollies made from old cigarette butts and felt my mood plummet even further.
The staff at Centrelink were extremely helpful and I couldn't fault them for the service they provided.
However, it took all the effort I could muster not to burst into tears as I spoke to them. On leaving the office, I had a 'sunglasses' moment as I tried to hide my emotion....
I realised later my belief system is/was that I need to work for a living, that life is meant to be hard and nothing comes easy, so applying for the dole made me feel like a loser and a failure -not just to myself but to everyone around me. No matter what I did, or how much I distracted myself, I could not get past this feeling of hopelessness.
It wasn't until I was talking to Trish, I realised this belief system had entrenched so far into my psyche I became a victim to it without even trying to, or knowing why.
I have come a long way, I am making huge changes in my life and I have the opportunity to start fresh, to do something new in the direction I am pursuing, all I have to do is acknowledge it.
Sometimes we need to step back and realise that some of the belief systems we 'own' are not ours, that we need to acknowledge them and then let them fly free. How often do we reject or miss an opportunity because we don't feel we deserve it or we believe it's not the way things should be?
Its time for me to evaluate my belief systems and work out which are mine, which ones have been inherited or assimilated over the years and be true to me, not someone else's laws and beliefs. I also urge you to look at your own beliefs and cull out the ones that don't serve you or are your truth.
We are born perfect, we are still perfect, even now... we just need to believe in ourselves and dismiss other people's 'stuff' that has influenced us since birth.
Love and respect for ourselves, baby!